Practically perfect in every way.

What an admirably low-key choice for a penultimate episode. This is true Peak Moff - clever, intricate, logical, with a clever time-travel concept and the best ideas this show ever had.

Here, it's one idea, done really well. 
  
I like how this Doctor's despair was so specific. He's the Discovery Doc, so of course his hell is a puzzle to be solved, and his cry for release "do I have to know everything?". This is not the first time we have seen him explain survival through logic, and it works for him. Intriguingly, this is also not the first time Eleven has taken on nightmares - it was there in Listen too. I loved the visuals of his memory palace - the lights of the TARDIS flickering on and off as he comes in and out of consciousness, and the sound of chalkstick as the sound of thinking. And the sound of the flies too (someone buy the sound mixing team a beer, it was a beautiful episode)

I also liked how the confession dial itself looked like a TARDIS - cloisters, and corridors, very like Eight's TARDIS; and how the castle rotated, one of those throwaway bits of brilliance Moff can just dash away over his morning toast.

TANGENT TIME:

It would be egotistic to assume that Doctor Who's showrunner has been reading my criticisms, but somehow he has taken them on board. This has been a great season.

First: he's calmed it down a bit, or maybe he is running out of ideas, and creating better episodes because he is rationing them more thoughtfully - allowing us non-Timelords to focus on merely one or two at a time, and allowing him to explore them more fully.

Second: Both Clara and the Doctor have had one single character note to explore, and far richer characters have come of it. The Clara we see this season has been shaped by her experiences in the previous one, and it seems genuine and organic - the sort of development I always wanted Amy to have.

More than that: Clara had the sort of small-scale drama that RTD excelled at, putting the universe and chips side by side. It was small and understated, and not...your boyfriend dies then comes back then becomes an immortal Roman auton and your imaginary friend is real and married in the future to your daughter who was also your childhood friend but you never knew you were pregnant so you're not really fussed that she was geo-engineered as a weapon also she's a timelord, and you never get a scene in which you emotionally process any of that. 

Clara's first problem was living in London and being too busy to fit everything in - we've all been there - and her second problem was that her boyfriend was dead, and she was struggling to deal with it. We've all been there too. It was nice, and so quiet. Clara's increasing recklessness has been handled so delicately throughout this series. This is solid and subtle character writing, very wonderful indeed. 

Third: no sex comedy and weird obsession with gender-essentialism. I don't know where that went this series, but I'm glad it's gone. I'm a six year old boy and I'm here for SPACESHIPS and DINOSAURS, and not bizzare heterosexual jokes about how much men and women hate each other. Maybe this is a function of the acting rather than the writing: I hear that Peter Capaldi was firm about not having romances with his co-star on account of his age; in any case, he does not play those opportunities for laughs.

All the same, the usual criticisms I have about his female characters (only existing in lady-centric plots about marriage and children/repeated scraping-the-barrel 50th Birthday card jokes about the "difference" between men and women.../bawd)...just didn't show up this year. I don't have words for how relieved I am. That kind of comedy makes me uncomfortable. 

Additionally, this series had two women writing, and two directing making it the best female representation to date in the new series. (There were no women creatives in series 1, 2, 6, 7 or the specials; only one in S3, 5 and 8; and two in S3. This is an embarrassment.). Also, this series had the best female representation of any season of Doctor Who since 1963.

Look I know I've been throwing shit at Mr Moffat's writing for over 5 years now, but if he keeps writing like this he can stay as long as he likes. This was a wonderful season in every way, and I really feel like he found...almost a courage in his own voice. His early seasons were overachiever seasons - they had so many good ideas that they were an utter mess, and which for me at least, were too busy being clever to connect emotionally. This season felt confident by comparison. He's found a way of translating his skill at the small episode across the whole season, and I'd happily watch three or four more of them.

Back to the article. I'm delighted that someone had the courage to dedicate Saturday night kids television to pared-back existentialism. From the start, I was totally revved to see a solo Doctor adventure, but you know not many actors could have pulled it off. One of my frustrations with the series so far has been - you've got Peter Capaldi, use him. I first became a fan in Children of Earth, where he knocks it out of the park in a two-hander against an empty fishtank filled with smoke. I cannot picture any other Doctor so brilliant, left alone in a room with skulls and intimations of mortality.

Now. About the next episode. Please don't have traded-in all the noise from this episode to have extra noise in the next one. The smartest thing Lawrence Miles ever said was in his uncharitable review of The Ancestor Cell:

It's a novel which seriously believes itself to be a world-shaking, cataclysmic epic, but which in its "middle act" largely consists of drab Time Lord supporting characters running up and down corridors being chased by spiders, combined with exposition scenes so massively over-inflated that they make Julia Sawalha's arse look small. What we've basically got is THE INFINITY DOCTORS  with all the good bits missing, a desperate attempt to do something big and important which can't tell the difference between "epic" and "just happens to be set on Gallifrey".

I feel like 100% of episodes set on Gallifrey have this problem. Gallifrey's a boring place (even if the Doc now insists he didn't leave because he was bored...)

I've got that quote all prepped for next week's review. Pray Rassilon I do not need it...

Other thoughts

"My day can't get any worse, so let's see what I can do about yours"
"Rule one of dying: don't. Rule two: slow down"
"I finally ran out of corridor."


Can we talk about how Who always hires women to direct the surrealist-lyrical episodes? This is a tradition spanning back to Fiona Cumming.

Face the Raven

Four word review: contrived and emotionally false.

It's amazing how an episode like Under the Lake can fit in so much, then there's an episode of the same length where nothing happened at all.

The single goal of fiction is to convince you that characters are real, and then make you care about them. I didn't care about Riggsy. I don't care about Me. I didn't even care about Clara, because I could feel the author manouvering them into place. Example: The shadow lock can be moved from person to person! But only once! And there was a deal with the shadows which means Riggsy would have been fine but Clara can't be, because we can't make a new deal. For reasons.

I can feel the author making it up as they go along. It's lazy plotting, and I don't accept it. The Doctor can say "There's something very wrong here...!" but I don't care unless I can feel it.

So many good ideas in here. The tattoo was creepy and cool. The street which looks like you expect it to, and of course a London hidden street would appear Victorian to people - even if the set was lousy. I liked mentioning Jane Austen again. I loved the scene of glasses over London.

But the whole thing lacked momentum, weight, depth.

Just go shuffle those pieces around so they're in the right place for the finale.

Other thoughts
"Infinite life, finite memory" - that's a lovely line of dialogue. That whole conversation where Clara is trying to grapple with a person who has entirely forgot their meeting, but knows they had one, was charming. The bit where Me pointedly assures Clara she is under her personal protection is less good. Oooooh! Foreshadowing!!!

"The Doctor is no longer here and you are stuck with me" - the one part of this whole episode which I believed. #valeyard

Also, the first time any Doctor has ever attempted to threaten someone with his huge reputation and I've believed it.

I think Masie Williams has been very cleverly cast in this role. We all know her as Arya, who is a little girl, even as we know that the actress is much older. That strangeness and double-seeing over her age works really well to suggest an ageless creature.

Deep Breath - Review

Overall, I felt really positive about this episode.

(I've not reviewed a Doctor Who episode in over 2 years, so you will have to be gentle with such clunky sentences until I get back into the groove)

But saying that much is still saying quite a lot. I stopped watching for a little bit, because the casual sexism made me feel so cruddy, and the lack of character development was frustrating, and it got to a point where I couldn't ignore it.

All of that was there in this episode. But I feel like Peter Capaldi is going to take the edge off it. I like him a lot, and I look forward in hope to seeing how his character evolves over time.

Twelve

I especially liked the shot where he held up the silver plate, and realised that he too had been changing so many elements of himself that he cannot necessarily be said to be the same man. So too the suggestion that he has taken on this face because it is a lesson he needs to be taught (PC appeared before twice in the Whoniverse, once in Fires of Pompeii as a family the Doctor only saves because his companion reminds him that he can; and once in Torchwood: Children of Earth as a morally compromised civil servant who fucked up very badly before killing himself and his whole family. The Doctor wasn't around in the latter crisis, so there is perhaps a message there instead.) I liked the subtlety with which this was done, and also the reference to Girl in the Fireplace - it doesn't matter if you don't know where the reference is, because the Doctor also can't remember and doesn't much care.

(Colin Baker also appeared in Who before he took on the main role, as imperious Timelord soldier Commander Maxil. Some links:

• Commander Maxil was a defender of Gallifrey. During Trial of a Timelord, Six exposed the corruption at the heart of Gallifrey and
• Commander Maxil shot the Doctor. Six's greatest villain was also a future version of himself.
• Both have the same personality attributes of being a real stick up the arse to anyone who disagreed.) 

The true test of any Doctor is the sitting-down-and-talking-to-the-villain scene. I guess we all knew PC would be capable of it, seeing as his acting opposite an empty fishtank in Children of Earth was so spine-prickling. Talking someone into killing themselves is definitely a Doctorlike attribute - a man who likes to think of himself as a man who doesn't kill. I don't think the robot jumped, I think by and large robots - even ones which use human body parts - don't tend to do things like that.

(I guess it's going to be some time before I use "Twelve" as a name for an individual. Give me time. It'll happen)

Eleven
The phone call from Doctor 11 was a really cool idea. I have some misgivings about it, in that I felt it kinda undermined the new Doctor. Regeneration episodes tend to have the Doctor pass out a lot, so that the danger feels so great that by the time he wakes up, you're just so darn glad to see him that you don't care there's a new face. Reintroducing 11 after that process has happened is therefore cheating, but it's a kinda cool idea.

But what I realised is that I really hate the Eleventh Doctor. That feeling I was getting when I stopped watching the show, and which had been mostly absent during this episode, came hammering back as soon as he picked up the phone. What a horrible, emotionally manipulative thing to do to your companion. I know the Doctor does that stuff all the time, but when I look back Eleven now feels...particularly involved in his companion's hearts and lives to a somewhat unhealthy extent.

The Castelanne, fellow member of Team Traken, suggested that he was an incredibly needy person and ended up doing bad things because he couldn't master his emotions; I rather like that interpretation. I always had trouble figuring out where Eleven came in the Doctor's emotional development, but I would accept that in his desire to regenerate into a more carefree person, he became emotionally irresponsible. I feel like I could rewatch his series interpreting the character as pretty damaged but in a less obvious, more damaging way and enjoy them more for that understanding. "I'm not your boyfriend...I didn't say it was your mistake" is a colossal admission, and I think a large key to 11's character.

And maybe one reason I found the casual sexism less objectionable in this episode is because the Doctor was not involved in it. I don't mind the Doctor having romantic plots in principle, but if "involved in romance" means "involved in the weird sexual/gender politics of the post-RTD series", I'm happy to see it go.

Everything Else

I would watch a whole series of just Jenny and Madam Vastra. I am so glad they've become reoccuring characters.

I've never liked Clara before, and I feel like her relationship together with the Doctor is going to be fun.

The plot was fun tosh. I'm a sucker for all things steampunk. I think the concept of the clockwork robots was cleverer in Girl in The Fireplace, because it was set in a non-traditional steampunk era. Seeing the robots in top hats in the fog is always fun, but translating that meme to 18th century France adds a clever touch.

"Don't breathe" is up there with the other Moffisms ("don't blink" being the most famous; but I know there have been others; but I can't remember them, because the time has passed when this information was on the surface of my brain. "Stay out of the shadows" in Forest of the Dead. Others, I can't remember.) but I liked this one a lot.

"Doctor Who ‘lesbian-lizard’ kiss will not face investigation" is the best headline I've ever seen. There were six complaints; my Companion suggests that he hopes at least one was because it broke class barriers. A lady kissing a maid? Shocking!

Don't talk to me about Missy. I don't want to think about this subplot. Like this show needs another River-Song-template woman person. Could that paradise they were in be the cloisters of a TARDIS, and could she be the Rani? Perhaps, but I already find this character unbearable.

Sexismwatch

So one thing I want to do in these reviews is be not critical, because complaining all the time ruins the show for people - primarily me. That said, I can't switch my brain off and - indeed - I have no desire to. People shouldn't have to give up dignified representations of themselves in exchange for enjoyable telly, great telly should do both.

Preditory lesbian characters? Check! (Listen up Clara, and also straight ladies of the world. Just because you're talking to a lesbian, it doesn't mean she's secretly attracted to you. What a crass addition to the episode). Dodgy relationship politics? Check! (Listen up, Moff! I feel like 80% of the point of being a lesbian is that your partner doesn't casually objectify you by demanding you stand half-naked and be decorative while she works. And while there clearly are creepass lesbians in the world, this felt more like translating a heterosexual power imbalance straight into a gay relationship, in a way which felt utterly inauthentic.)

A longer post following on this topic. For now, though, let's give this a 7/10 for a promising standard episode.

Night Terrors

"We're dead. Again."

I've heard Mark Gatiss derided as a derivative writer. I always thought this rather unfair - fans are the first to complain when the show changes too much, and Who writers have always drawn from what they are reading, from Holmes' victoriana to Chris Boucher's Asimov retellings. Besides which, there is little evidence of this from his Who work. Unquiet Dead has been described as Hinchcliffey, but mostly because it's gothic horror and the genre has been used rarely since that era. It's also divine, a real favourite of mine. I've never been a fan of The Idiots Lantern, but its Twilight Zone stylings were more affectionate than kleptomaniac. And there was a lot to like in Victory of the Daleks if you ignored the rather limp plot - it borrows wholesale from the traditional war film, but why should it not? Caves of Androzani was only Phantom of the Opera with the bronze replaced with stainless steel.

But I confess, Night Terrors brought this argument rushing back to me. You see, this week, Mark Gatiss isn't doing a long-dead literary genre: he's doing Steve Moffat. Children in danger, the Doctor who values and sorts out things so small as a family, fairytale dolls house, moderately intricate plot, forgetting. Plus the ending of The Doctor Dances, to cap the impression off. It set the teeth on edge at once - because I like Gatiss a lot, and hate finding evidence for a theory I've decided is wrong; because I dislike a lot of what Moff does, on similarly implacable and instinctive grounds. There's also a difference between a reference and a wholesale rewrite - using the baby masks from Brazil, and the shrinking bedroom from Time Bandits, is a reference.

And with that in mind, my brain started nitpicking. All of a sudden, its similarities to Fear Her - another much hated episode - were intolerable; not to mention to Idiot's Lantern. A scared little boy who hides his dolls in the closet? Nope, move along, no agenda to see here...

So let's try and focus on the positive. Night Terrors did better than either of those episodes at creating a world where children transfer their genuine fears to the supernatural. Idiots Lantern did gay kids in the 50s, Fear Her did child abuse (anyone got on the phone to Tennant yet about making sure he gets a run with the Olympic torch...?). Night Terrors was the least plausible - alien child! - but got the best emotional mileage. An alien allegory dealing for the idea of rejection by parents, and indeed, a sort-of queer subtext which is there if you want to see it, and not if you don't (similarly, there's a sort-of autism subtext for those interested). The scene where a scared Alex was being threatened by the landlord, coming through the walls to the ears of scared George, was standout. It might have been more satisfying if George's fears were justified, though. One little hug, and suddenly all his problems are sorted. Kids ain't stupid, and they can tell where they're not wanted. It's abundantly clear that his parents are worried, and it might have made more sense if the source of his fear was something external. Alternately, Alex turning around to say "I can't stand the sight of the little shit, and I definitely want him out now I know he's not human." That wouldn't be very life-affirminly Who, but it would set it apart from a swathe of episodes where simply facing your fears is a psychologically dubious way of solving problems.

I was a bit worried on first seeing the setting: for your average, British middle-class audience member, a council estate is the scariest place on earth. I'm really glad it didn't do anything tacky. Bit annoyed at the landlord, though - poor old Andrew Tiernan, he's got a face for bastards and I've never seen him perform anything remotely sympathetic, except perhaps in that Suede video. He is a middle class cliche of what council estate dwellers are like - complete with the big, ugly dog - and is accordingly vile, and is accordingly fair game to be picked off by Dolls. Disappointing - there's a difference between a character who performs the role of an antagonist to what the protagonists want, and a character who deserves to be turned into wood. Twas a mistake to let Amy get caught though - as soon as a companion is in that sort of peril, it is certain that she will be saved.

Alex is a great character well performed, though. I particularly love that he remains important to the plot - the Doctor needs his insights about George, instead of just dragging him along for someone to talk to. As much as I'm disliking this era, I love that for Eleven, rescuing a single child is as important as all the more glam Times Champion stuff. Just sitting in George's room to play. Trying to behave, by tidying the rubix cube he instinctively drops. Through crimson stars and silent stars and tumbling nebulas like oceans set on fire. Through empires of glass and civilisations of pure thought and a whole terrible, wonderful universe of impossibilities. I always want to hate those speeches, they are so contrived, and so authorly, and so beautifully written, and then performed, that I can't help but adore them.

I enjoyed the wonderful sickly yellow direction; wonderful sound effects, with the lift - I clocked the importance of that sound early on, but not what it was, which is the best combination. More than I can say for the plot - it was pretty easy to guess where Rory and Amy were. Or the scares which were, for me at least, more enjoyably hokey than genuinely scary. Still, I loved the surreal addition of huge scissors and eyeballs; the throwaway references to "Snow White and the Seven Keys to Doomsday", or the "Emperor Dalek's New Clothes". Eleven has always reminded me of Chris Morris in Space, and never more than with his absurdist hat on. For all of this, though, the denoument is appallingly lazy - why would nervous George open the wardrobe after what he's just seen? Is the slo-mo only included to get the running time up?


I don't want to press the issue, but this was the second review I wrote for Night Terrors. The first was an embeded video of the McCann family's first press conference; I changed my mind because it seemed inappropriate. Of course, there should be little linking a real-life tragedy with a meaningless romp like Who, but I mean it as illustration for what is so wrong with Amy and Rory right now. It needn't be grim, but it needs to be there. Losing a child is perhaps the most intolerable thing that can happen to a parent, even before you cram in all the sci-fi stuff. When the Doctor asks where they want to go, I'd have admired either of them more if they'd replied: "to find Melody, you incompetant alien!" I want to see them rewriting time so their little girl doesn't grow up to be a psychopath, squabbling with the Doc when he can't work out what's wrong, and even if the dialogue isn't there, I want to see a certain brokenness in their performances, a sense of sorrow even if it's not acknowledged. This week's plot, about a lost and frightened little boy who is terrified of losing his family, should have been intensely triggering to the both of them. Perhaps that, given the bizzare nature of the birth and soforth, their reactions will be very different from yer average parent. Well, say that then - give us scenes to appreciate how Amy and Rory's weird circumstances are making them think of it differently.

The internet tells me this is because Night Terrors was originally early on in Season 6A. You can't shuffle like this with an ongoing arc! It doesn't have to be dwelt on, but it does need to be plausible. And I'm going to say it on their behalf, every week, until they remember.

Ratings out of ten are a blunt instrument. How can you judge an episode which got 10/10 for all the little things, but screwed up on the big ones? 6/10 for being lazy, 7/10 for how much I liked it, 8/10 for the small moments squirreled away. 9/10 for being closer to the series I'd rather be watching. An above average episode I do not feel the need to rewatch any time soon? 6/10

Let's Kill Hitler!

"You've got a time machine, I've got a gun, so what the hell, lets kill Hitler!"

Oh, let this be my year again, let me suddenly get what everyone else can see, and let this be my year. I've been enjoying Matt Smith's series, but only with my mind. Something of the feverish enthusiasm has died for me in the past two seasons, enthusiasm which The Pirate Planet or Mawdryn Undead can still rouse with no effort at all.


Season 6B-B has started promisingly - I'm cautiously pessimistic. What a great line, and what a great title! So great I've started wondering if I'd have loved it half as much under a different title. It's perky, conspiratorial and tickles the imagination alongside the funnybone.

The episode abandoned its cheeky premise fairly quickly - which might be for the best. Knockabout romp is perhaps the wrong medium to tackle the world's worst conflict, especially with Who's sister show doing it with so much subtltey and finesse on channel 2...Who has never touched Hitler, save through allegory, and the manner in which it was done here was divine - befitting the subject's gravity without being mawkish. Whether it's that weird aura, that charisma and the piercing eyes which Hitler (and many Notable Men of History) is said to have had, or the sheer historical momentousness, it seems everyone is a bit freaked out by being in the same room as him. From the director, who nervously characterised him as hands, the back of an ear, the corner of glasses, trying not to meet his gaze, to the cast, all unsure of what to say. Not quite awkwardness, not quite fear - an excellent moment all round.

As it stood, 30's Berlin was just wallpaper to a story in which everything seemed to be happening. Historical, character piece and sci-fi all at once - one of my notes reads "implausible everything". This is Doctor Who at its very best. Douglas Adams has been suggested as a source for the Tesselecta robot, but his most important influence is City of Death, which achieves a similar balance between the show's time and/or space mandate.

And so we have the childlike soft-science idea of a body that's a spaceship filled with tiny men; juxtaposed with the more adult sci-fi idea that time travel could be misused to wreak vengeance on unpunished criminals. We have a beautifully realised, desaturated, snowy Berlin, on the dawn of a great historical moment; and just as beautifully realised, we have the moment Amy discovered Rory was in love with her. Who can do all these things, but rarely tries it all at once. That it succeeds is a credit to Steve Moffat's bravurah skill for juggling ideas, like so many plates and firebrands, without once letting them touch the ground.

One of his notable failures in Series 5 was convincing emotion, those little human moments that could take a scene from the end of the Earth to fish and chips in under a double-beating-heartbeat. Series 6 was a little better, and now the story of Amelia's childhood rebuts my criticism entirely. I hope this continues. Picking on little Rory, playing some of those endless Doctor-centric games, and how very, very sweet that moment of realisation between the two of the was.

Mels, on the other hand, grated from her first instant on screen. Not just for being annoying, but for being the latest in a long line of sassy, self-assured, dull dames, each about as plausible as Monarch's masterplan to prove he is god by going back in time to meet himself. I felt so much better when it turned out she was one I already hated. Freed from being the latest in a downhill trend, I retrospectively rather liked her. And it proved that unexpected little sequence of Amy's childhood was quite deliberately out of place: like Adam in Torchwood, one feels Mels has only ever always existed from the moment you see it happens.

You can see some of River's more insane qualities here at their genesis - later to mature and zen out, but still not entirely grown out of her bonkers teenage phase of 'jacking buses just 'cus. One can only assume that, like Susan, she must have been very bored and lonely at that school. While Susan's school days consisted of blurred close-ups and surreal, radiophonic interludes, Mels default response to historical tragedies is "because the Doctor didn't stop it". The idea was done with more finesse by Lawrence Miles in Interference, with the Eighth Doctor challenged by his companion to intervene in Bosnia, Kosovo or Northen Ireland; here it is effectively played for laughs.


And that relationship finally works for me. In fact, a lot of my previous River-related quibbles are no more. It still stands that she is a poorly concieved idea of what a Strong Female Character should be, and that personally she sets my teeth on edge. But for the first time, I'm responding to her positively - when previously, I'd hardly dignify her with "spack off out of my canon, you make no sense!"

Information is required to contextualise things we see. We are no longer suprised that the TARDIS is bigger inside than out, because we are familiar. When the Doctor says something like "great, more guilt!" we know exactly what he means, because we've been through Rose, Martha and Donna's stories with him; when he is so insistant that his murderer be saved, this makes sense because we've been with him since the 60s and we know he'll give anyone a break. The idea of the Doctor being married to a Time Traveller's Wife is genius, but smug, self-assured River has always seemed so wrong to me. The companions he seems closest to are the Jo Grants, Aces and Roses of this world - the not especially well-learned or inherently competant, but smart and brave, and willing to take chances and learn. What did he see in River, who is not only violent, but unimpressed by his showing off, and cocky about her own perfection? I was seeing her at the wrong time. "River needs me!", the Doctor said, and it suddenly all made sense. The River I'd misunderstood in Silence of the Library was not the River he'd fallen in love with. It's the broken Mels of Lets Kill Hitler, the Mels who needs guidance, the Mels whose screwed-up life is all the Doctor's fault, making it his self-imposed duty to save her.

I imagine, for a bleeding heart like the Doc, that quality is irresisteable in a gal. The learning and guiding and showing off all comes in the bits we haven't seen.

i09 has accurately identified that enjoyment of the series is now directly related to how much one is interested in River Song, which is rather unfortunate for Team Traken - to greater and lesser extents, we've never been able to stand her. I still can't, and I'd be happier if she never showed up again. But she gets a pass into canon now, at least, and makes sense, and I admit to being more interested in her now than I ever before have been. I have a horrible suspicion that when the story is done, and the mind can reassemble it into order, I will at last become most fond. How embarassing.

No comment on the fact she has regenerations. I think the Doctor's reasons that Jenny can not, and never will be a Timelord speak for themselves.


All the other usual comments stand. Mr Smith is perfection. Rory's really good. Amy remains a frustrating character with fine legs. Someone dies again, of course, and it would have been a beautiful regeneration if, of course, that is what it had been. Loving Rory's right hook, and every single time the word "Hitler" was used as a throwaway moment of absurdist comedy - "Shut up, Hitler!"; "Put Hitler in the cupboard!" Eleven's standout moment was proposing marriage to the dying Mels.


The Teselecta was a great new addition to canon - both as a robot concept, and as a mission. Hunting down historical rotters - what a piece of sadistic genius! The Doctor's incredulous sarcasm is just right for expressing what an absurdly wasteful, but kinda enthralling, idea it is. Bridge-based drama is a specialty of mine - so hands up who else wondered how well Blake'n'co would do at piloting a Tesselecta...? The Doctor should definitely count as a bigger war criminal than River, though, as should Hitler - unless there's something we've really not been told about her. Conflating the three characters under the same banner skirts the edge of taste, especially if River's only crime is indeed to kill the Doc. Not sure how I feel about them being put on an explicitly real-life spectrum of morality.

That's more than I can say for the TARDIS interface, though. Bit of a weird scene. It could have ben heartbreaking with someone else - like Sharaz-Jek finding no one but his robots to hold him - but as it stands, its a bloody TARDIS interface, the Doctor knows she's just an interface, and even if he didn't, it tells him. Multiple times. With your future wife being chased by a robot and your best chums trapped in said robot's head, can't you find enough hope on your own?

The Doctor's standards are interesting here. Young Amelia doesn't make him feel bad because he hasn't screwed her up. Is this his alien understanding of time or Moff's alien understanding of character? Because the Doctor is right - Amelia exists, and always will exist at a point where he he "hasn't screwed up yet". There was a point where Rose, Martha and Donna were equally guilt-free. Because Amelia only exists at a point before they know he has. Actually, she's has been screwed from the start - her parents have vanished down a crack the exploding TARDIS created, just as her best friend is actually her daughter in another regeneration. Given how her timey-wimey lifeline is garotted around that of the Doctor and River she is, in a sense, doomed from birth in a way no other companion has been.

So do we blame Moff? Earlier series focused quite heavily on the companion's emotional state, so it is hard to ignore the guilt the Doctor might feel at how Rose, Martha and Donna turned out. I've stopped trying to pretend that Amy is a consistent character who develops from episode to episode - she only makes sense with a crack in her mind which wipes her experience every time the credits roll.

Now we are to believe that Amy and Rory can cope with, not just losing their child or missing her formative years entirely, but knowing she's been engineered as a psychopathic war machine. It's a great way to keep the characters in the TARDIS, instead of changing nappies in Leadworth; it's also totally implausible. They're not devastated, they're not pissed, they're not even overly concerned that their tearaway best friend is their little girl all grown up. They're just Amy and Rory, as usual.

Plus ca change. 8/10 from me!

Some other great lines:
Doctor: Then why don't I know you? I danced with everyone at their wedding... The women were all brilliant. The men... were a bit... shy.

Rory: "Anybody else find this day just a bit difficult?"

Amy: "Can you ride a motorbike?"
Rory: "I expect so, it's that sort of day."

"I was on my way to this gay gypsy bar mitzvah for the disabled, and then I thought ‘Gosh, the Third Reich’s a bit rubbish’”

Other thoughts:

• Some great clothing in this one - not yet sure about the Doc's new coat, but lovin' River's hat and the sonic cane.
  
• that sequence with the banana is straight from Curse of Fatal Death. Who'da thought?
• The episode I watched just before this was Mawdryn Undead. At the time, comparisons between the two episodes were so clear in my mind I merely wrote "Like Mawdryn". I wonder what I meant...?
  

Speculation:

• Who thinks that River's sacrifice of c.10 lives to bring the Doc back to life will come in handy five years down the line? We know Timelords can extend their number of regenerations - the Master made a hobby of it.
  
• At the same time - the Doctor's death at the lake is a fixed point? That is a scary thought. Mind you, Torchwood seems to be cheerily ignoring what the "fixed" in "fixed point" really means. And time can be rewritten. A maxim just like "wibbly wobbly, timey wimey" which simply means: "I can do whatever the spack I want".
• Why does the Doc change clothes? I hardly believe it's because he always dresses for the occasion. Besides, the confrontation in the restaurant at the end hardly lasts for 32 minutes. So where has he been? Fellow comrade Team Traken comrade Koschei noted: "any time the Doctor is off screen nowadays, it is potentially suspect."
  

The Day of the Moon

"No I think she's just dreaming..."

It still doesn't feel like my show, like something I am a part of. Instead, I am the salivating child pressed up against the sweetshop window, when before I was as good as employed there. Which is a shame, because this episode actually won at so many of my complaints. The moment between Doctor and Rory is, to me, one of the most memorable scenes from this era. We also learn "the Threat" are actually THE SILENCE - at long last! Now if only their names ahd bot been released until now. What a wonderful spineshivery, classic moment that'd be if you'd gone around with your fingers stuffed into your ears, and not checked the BBC website or read anything from the press.

But back to Rory. What is it about drippy males that makes so many fans angry? I'd speculate that the hatred of Mickey, Adric and Rory stem from the same source. We watch television for wish fufillment - we* are the Doctor; we don't like to be reminded that in life, we're actually a bit cowardly and rubbish and incompetant with females.

*working on the basis that your stereotypical Who fan is an incompetant male dwelling in mama's basis.

I've always had a soft spot for him - far more empathetic than Ms Pond - even while I despair of his dependancy on her. In discussions with my crowd, we feel the relationship is a realistic one - but it doesn't mean a small part of me doesn't want him to grow a spine. I admire his devotion, and despair of it at the same time. I can see what he sees in her to an extent - she's nice enough. She's not, however, 2000 years worth of nice. I liked this episode for acknowledging his character "flaws" as intentional character facets. Useless, but canonically so. His declaration that Amy can always hear him is really sweet, and pathetic, but still sweet in equal measure. Rory is hardcore! but still in a timid way. I like the momentary, chilling reference to the memory ghost recordings - one of my favourite all-time scenes - and this has a similar impact. We can hear Amy's distress, but there is no way of alleviating it. Very effective, very unpleasant.

Amy? Ouch. My heart just broke for him when Amy started calling for the Doctor. In fact, this was a poor Amy episode all round - what part of "record what you are seeing" did she interpret as "just scream cus none of what you're seeing's important"? Although I did admire her "just say no!" response to Silent interrogation, reminded me very much of the personal safety course I attended.

In general, I like the rather awkward interplay between the three of them. The Doctor's little look as he overhears Amy's message. Calling her on telling him about the baby first. Oh, Rory! I was particularly happy to see his Auton years tackled on screen - we'd all been wondering. Not just that they did it, or that the solution was so good, but that they did it so well

"No"
"Lying?"
"of course."

It's the thread I had been waiting for - this emotion runs all the way through. Has, perhaps, Moff taken my individual complaint on board due to my status as an inestimably important member of the Doctor Who fandom and world in general? Whatever it is, I hope it lasts - it restores what I felt was so badly missing last season. Long may it remain!

As predicted, part two changes tack entirely from the previous episode - instantly more expansive and, for me, less effective. I was entirely unenchanted at the time, but having mulled for a few days I'm feeling more positive. Nothing wrong with it. Why do I still have problems? I don't know. And the amount they cram in here requires a rather shoddy cliffhanger resolution, plus an elegant Rory-based exposition dump. I hope they will explain why they were all running from the Feds at the start, and that it's not just a gimmick to look cool. If there's a reason, I may forgive. If not? Oh look, the death counter is up yet again. Dramatic currency is extorted from
three dead companions - I'm not sure how far to push this, as they're not actually dead at any point - but then the same goes for the other "emotive" deaths they have survived. While we're Moffing, note again the critical role of a young child and the textbook "every time there has been a creak in your house, it's monsters FACT" speech. In fact, I'm sure he's used "corner of your eye" before in Eleventh Hour.

"As long as there's been something in the corner of your eye, or creaking in your house. or breathing under your bed, or voices through a wall, or Moffat as your script editor..."

My feelings on River were more mixed in this episode, but in general, my antipathy has dimmed. For every pithy bit of banter, there was her tottering around buildings in daft shoes and going into Slaughter God Mode. That spin is especially painful, and especially not what Doctor Who is about - although I did like the Doctor's comment that he kinda likes it and isn't sure why. It also makes me wonder if there is a Reason for her awesomeness. That shooting was inhumanly good. Is she an android? A construct? Some other form of superbeing? Would explain a lot.

Due to various personal crises, I am, against my will, involved in that romance dammit. I guess the Doctor Is Asexual camp is defended by that same troop of stereotypical fans without girlfriends. I've never really been a member, though I am nontheless a tad peeved about them putting romance in my show. This is more personal than partisan - I like the dynamic, I like the show going somewhere it hasn't before, and I'm interested to see how both couples - I think we can say "couple" now - pan out. I just like my Saturday night entertainment to be about temporal warp ellipse cutout, and compensatory sonics and spaceships, and impassive sci-fi gimmicks that only I understand so I feel superior when explaining them...

Indeed, my biggest problem with the plotline has always been how-too annoying River is. I'm a big fan of Patience (Cold Fusion) and that three-orgasm chapter in the middle; I also think there's strong basis for believing 3 genuinely loved Jo. But River - I never saw what the Doctor saw in her. I still don't entirely, but I am appreciating 11's dialogue touches which are beginning to give a reasonable motive. Smug. Vicious. Quite unlike the other most important relationships in the Doctor's life: Rose, Ace and Jo stand out as particularly strong to me, and all three are built on enthusiastic naivete. None of them are especially smart, but they have guts and bravery and initiative. That'd be my template for the Doctor's Ideal Girl. Still is, but now it's been articulated on screen I can accept the idea that he is attracted to her for all the wrong reasons - "I should object to that; kinda do a bit". Perhaps simply because Matt Smith is carrying it off with such charm! I'm still enjoying the banter.

No qualms with the kiss at all. I like 11's awkwardness, but also the way he seems touched too amid the confusion. My heart broke again for River when she realised it was the last time.

Still, it wasn't all gloom and doom. Dragging Nixon around was one of the funniest Who jokes I've seen in a while - very silly. My anthropologist sister liked River's "archeology - I love a good tomb". Canton's dazed-but-accepting "whatever a videophone is" was a fine moment also, and I liked Amy's "you're ugly" retort. River's building dive set my teeth on edge; but I instantly forgave at the swimming pool gag. Wonderful!


Onto the Serious Themes And Stuff. I loved their use of the Neil Armstrong footage - there's something strangely pleasing about this nod to his importance. So much of science fiction's fates are intertwined with science facts, and seeing the Doctor explain its significance to viewers who may never before have seen it was a valuable harken back to the educational days of old. There's probably also a valuable bit of evidence here for any would-be essay On The Power Of Watching Telly. But I'll leave that for another time.

At the same time, there's a growing Who streak which I Do Not Like at all. Its interactions and interventions in history seem increasingly anti-humanist. When Tom Baker interacted with Shakespeare and Leonardo in City of Death, it was just that - interaction. He wrote out Hamlet, but did not write it. The Doctor was Leo's chum, but Leo's genius was his own. Nowadays, the gimmick is upside-down. Charles Dickens doesn't invent The Mystery of Edwin Drood. Shakespeare's skill alone does not create his witches. Vincent needs Amy to draw his attention to sunflowers. The Doctor goes on about humanity's invention, but whenever we go back and see it all I see is copying. And City of Death is hardly innocent - Scaroth built the pyramids and invented all the science. Last week, I loved the Doctor's statement that humans went to the moon "because it was there". Great, positive humanist statement. Indomitable!

It was, I guess, setup. Because this week, the Doctor changes his theory - humans were influenced to go to the moon because the Silence wanted a space-suit. And in addition, most of human history has been invisibly created and controlled by hypnotists. Oh. Really? Oh.

(I'm aware I'm using the word "humanist" here in a bit of a fuzzy sense; nevertheless, the Doctor is a humanist in terms of non-religious compassion and morality, and celebration of human achievement and dignity. Wiki "humanism" and you'll see what I mean)

And while we're talking about human dignity, I remember a bit of worry about the Americanisation of these episodes/series/show as a whole - probably by rightly-paranoid veterans of 1996. Simultaneous broadcast in America? Filming in Utah? All in the first episode?

If that was you, then you were wrong. I loved how subversive the episode was. In other words, despite all that, there was no compromise within the script. Moff made jokes about gun-toting - I particularly loved "Welcome To America". And as we all rather suspected, Canton is dating a man; but it only occured to me this week that his expulsion from the FBI is a fairly direct parallel to the debates on Prop 8. The type of message pushing I'd judge somewhere between irritating and morally unconscionable - if not for my complete, gobsmacked commitment to equal marriage. If you are going to go out of your way to appeal to a specific audience - here, mainstream America - then why not shoehorn in a message? I was also surprised by the mention of race, but of course - I kept forgetting, it's 1969. Nice parallel, although I expect the wankier corners of the web are already on fire for the comparison.

On that note, the use of guns really stood out for me here - investigating depictions of screen violence is one of my nerdier hobbies, and I plan a longer article once I've rewatched the New Series. In The Writer's Tale, I remember reading that RTD put a GUN RULE in place: "this show will not feature humans shooting other humans with realistic guns". Great idea! The last thing that kids need, and especially on such a human-positive show as Who. It's interesting to see how it erodes even throughout his tenure:

• in Age of Steel, the Preachers have realistic guns but do not use them. I believe this is the context in which the GUN RULE is mentioned.
  
• In the Last of the Timelords trilogy, there are a LOT of guns - Jack is gunned down; the Master's cronies shatter the back of their escaping car. I rather admired it in context - that trilogy is a cut above in the gritty-nasty standards and earns them by not being too gratuitous or glorifying.
• The next notable use is The Doctor's Daughter, in which Jenny is shot by a familiar pistol and the Doctor then picks it up and threatens another humanoid. Part of me thought "steady on!" even while watching, although that was mostly my incredulity at the dialogue.
• And then again, during The End of Time, the Doctor is armed with a pistol. This was another case in which context was clear and justified: we had a sense of the very high stakes. The Doctor moralises to Wilf on how weapons are not the answer, and ultimately chooses not to fire at anyone. He picks up that gun for that little word, that one exception - and by this point we were all invested in quite how important that word was.

Day of the Moon and it's friend are completely guntastic. The serial gunning down of companions is, I belive, the darkest use of guns within the New Series - there is no high-stake justification, it's characters we know and love, and we see it happen.

Even if the Silence are merely humanoid, I was also a little concerned at the implication they were about to be gunned down en masse. If the Doctor is so bothered by the Silence brainwashing humanity, why is it OK for him to condition them all to kill? Is this just the natural extention of Davros' claim that he turns people into weapons? A fabulously cheeky thread on GB asks how many Silence you think you've killed in your lifetime. Other people soften the blow by theorising the Doctor's plan merely makes Earth uninhabitable for the Silence, and it's a gamble to force them to leave. Still...the act of hypnotism is still there.

I also didn't like what River did next. It was gratuitous and ugly. You can't host an on-screen massacre without some sort of acknowledgement that that is what it is. A good comparison would be Warriors of the Deep - when people get killed, it's horrible and there are voices which say "this is horrible". No one comments on River's bloodbath - it's presented as a morally neutral image, and one that is repeatedly turned into a joke throughout the scene. Death isn't funny. Neither is killing your enemies. And neither of those are Who. Why couldn't they have run straight back into the TARDIS, not traded sexual repartee over the corpses? The scene is cooly directed, complete with wisecracks and badass spinning. Additionally, I felt considerable sympathy for the dying Silent. I don't mean this in a Mary Whitehouse sense - what children Should and Shouldn't be seeing is a matter for psychologists, never amateur commentators. But it is interesting.

But let's talk about that. This is one of my favourites, possibly my very favourite episode for the Eleventh Doctor himself. The first sense I've got of him truly distinguishing himself and demonstrating The Kind Of Man He Is. I suppose he has the evidence from Vampires in Venice that Silence are up to no good. Still. Engineering genocide on a global scale. He's done worse and he will again, but note how he does it - no angst a la Dix, none of 7's quiet remorse, no "Time's Policeman" entitlement or God-moding. He just does it. Even Six threw a wibbly after misjudging Lytton. The episode does not acknowledge consequences or guilt: this is a Doctor with a very tidy mind and nerves of steel. I kinda like that.

And look at his I'm-So-Clever-Speech-Confrontation-Scene. No "just go now!", no "Shadow Proclamation", no "let's talk about this over tea and muffins" or "I'm smart enough to talk you out of this!". Instead, he rules out forgiveness because "it's not Christmas", and offers up the show's most sardonic "sorry". Go give the Tennant a spin. Any episode, any season - it is made out of sorry. Look at that earnestness, the way that even if he'll do his best to forget the pain, in that one moment he means it. Now back to Smith. Now back to Tennant. Now back to Smith - the Doctor your Doctor should defeat evil like.

Outstanding. Weird. One To Watch. I love all the Doctors in their own way, both the woobies and wisecrackers. And in one of my hearts, I'm a committed Sixgirl - someone has to be - with a real soft spot for his practicality and flair. But unlike Six, who is merely well organised, it looks like Eleven has Bastard!Mode too.

"Let's rescue Amy!"
"Then what?"

I'm sorry, repeat? You can hear your companion crying, right? This is definitely new, and a clear difference to Six who turned into a steamroller the moment Peri was the least bit imperilled. Seven could be insentisive, but he never put Ace second quite so explicitly. I'm definitely interested in this wholly new development. In other news, I'm rather fond of his suddenly improved piloting skills - and rather loved the beard. But there's something...wrong...with his hair - a bit too well trimmed and not half bonkers enough in this episode.

Everything else.

I adored the orphanage - very hokey, but in a fun sort of way. It reminded me of the Little Sister's realm in Bioshock: the trapped girl, the run-down nursery, the mechanical suit. I also liked the American Gothic keeper - his dozy performance, that wonderful lazy accent and shabby clothes.
I think without him, the set would have rankled more - instead, he contributed marvellously to the atmosphere. Although I'm also not sure why they go back to the warehouse to examine the spaceman. I'd like to tidy up some canon here, but frankly, the TARDIS is a far more sensible choice and I'm fairly sure they simply didn't have the sets. I also loved the technology - the palmblips were simple but cool, while the talleys were a very effective lo-fi equivalent.

The music got mixed feelings from me. The odd motif, like the snazzy zinging over the White House, was really exciting. On the other hand, I am feeling Eleventh Doctor Theme fatigue. Yes, it's exciting. Yes, it's probably one of the three best pieces of Who-music ever created (The other two are "This Is Gallifrey" and the theme tune). Yes, it can generate a teraquadrupletonne of
anticipation-energy without even trying. But a piece of music that strong needs to be savoured, held back to make its useage all the more important. Rather like Casino Royale bravely ignoring the Bond theme until right at the very, very end; or the A-Team movie using that wonderful iconic tag oh-so sparingly. The last two episodes, I've really noticed it in the background, used in a rather tired and lazy fashion. No. When you use that music, it had better be the most important thing in the scene. Not just something zippy to smother with exposition.

The ending? Was marked by my housemates asking me why my empassioned swearing had just ricoched around our flat. Still not sure whether it was surprise or rage. I'm intrigued. There's a strong, partisan part of my brain going Wrong Wrong Wrong Wrong, but if I can shut that up for long enough I'm looking forward to seeing what they do with this plotline. All the same. Gallifrey is special, and I forsee epic anger if its resolution does not meet my exacting standards..

Just as I was beginning to wonder, the NEXT TIME confirmed that it's going to be a bit more episodic now. As much as I love the idea of proper overarching plots ("Torchwood" meme? Please...), I do feel it takes a little away from the show too. It's definitely something worth trying, but I'd hate this to become the pattern - it reduces its accessability, especially given quite how smart the current arc is.

And this one left a lot unanswered. Why does the Silence want Amy to tell the Doctor about his death? Why were the Feds chasing the companions? Why is the Doctor in the "perfect prison" (and wasn't that the Pandorica?) I am excited to learn what the little girl is needed for and, of course, who shot the Doctor. And don't get me started on last season - we still don't know who organised the Pandorica Party in the first place. Additionally, my writer's nouce says that they'd be fools if the Doctor didn't figure out his future death of his own accord - perhaps several episodes before he admits it. The drama of it is irresisteable, and I absolutely cannot wait.

But it was well constructed in that this episode - Day of the Moon - was sufficiently involving tha
t these things didn't matter during viewing. I cross my fingers for a tidy resolution, but my contempt for the Big Bang tangle left me too raw to blog, and not wholly optimistic.

However, my favourite moment by far occured during Amy's orphanage ramble. It was so unexpected that I was too distracted to write it in my notes, and forgot it entirely until rewatching today. How apt. Unless this was the mysterious "oooh unexpected. WOW" I'd scrawled. Something which sticks out so much you just don't see it. It was so inexplicable, so out of context, and so very exciting. A window opens where there is no window, a strange woman in white says "no I think she's just dreaming". Woman and window disappear. No idea at all what is going on there. And I can't wait for that either!

Other Points

• The world's worst continuity error? When Amy is being chased at the beginning, the long shot reveals that is clearly a slope, not a cliff. I don't normally notice these things - I prefer to simply believe - so if I am picking up, then it must be glaring.
• Creepy as it is, I don't see the point of charcoaling tallies on your face. Logistics if nothing else.
  
• Did you all notice this like following on from last week: "You have to trust me and no one else" says Eleven to Nixon. Trust!
  
• My notes also read that someone says "Never going to forget you". I wonder who? If I did remember, then this would surely be another significant use of memory to pick up on.
  
• UM. RECURSION. Shouldn't Eleven's TARDIS landing inside the "very aikman road" TARDIS cause bizzarity and surreal?
  
• Did Scaroth the Jaggeroth know of the Silence? Wouldn't their agendas have clashed rather?
• If you remember my demoralised reviewlets last season, my one big Lodger flaw was the Doctor's procrastination. It irked me beyond belief that he was mucking around in a call centre, and not simply going upstairs to save lives. Considering the Silence's powers, maybe the Doctor periodically forgot it was there? It's an otherwise good episode, so I'd be happy to rehabilitate it in this manner.
• If the Silence truly have been there since the dawn of civilisation then is it reasonable for the Doctor to say this is "incorrect" and unleash freedom on the human race? I mean, natural for humanity is evidently being watched and manipulated. It's all they've ever known. There is no pastoral state for them to return to.
  

Notable Lines
"Tape everything that happens in this office" - good advice, but the irony of it has only just struck me...

"Safe? No of course you're not safe. There's a billion other things out there just waiting to burn your whole world. But if you want to pretend you're safe just so you can sleep at night, ok, you're safe. But you're not really."

"Today the battle begins" - really? Battles aren't your style...aren't they?

"I believe the word you're looking for right now is... Oops! Run... Guys, I mean us - run!"

"What's the point in two hearts if you can't be a bit forgiving now and then? All right, you got me, I'm lying. I'm not going to let you go so easily; nice notion but it's not Christmas."

"This isn't an alien invasion, they live here. This is... their empire. This is kicking the Romans out of Rome!"
"Rome fell"
"I know, I was there"
"So was I"

Speculation

I am not interested in discussing this in any detail, because I'm just tossing around ideas. The moment theories get indepth, you're storywriting and setting yourself up for a fall when yours is better. Like my extreme disappointment when last year's megatheory went to pot. However:
Notes that I don't understand now but may in the future

• One idea I did have viz the mysterious FBI chase was hypnotism. If the Silence are hypnotising people, and they know the Doctor is a threat, then that may just explain it. I'm hoping for this to be addressed in canon really though.
  
• Has Amy been hypnotised? In particular, the direction of the almost-creepy scene when she is trapped in the bedroom suggests this is a possibility. Why else do they let her leave, and with such a strange expression?
• Please tell me that child isn't Amy's. I had an inkling of it last week, when the pregnancy bombshell and the spaceman's appearance coincided; and now it looks rather sure with the appearance of that baby photo. Hrm. Sounds a bit awful, but I'll wait to see how this pans out.
• I am not so happy with the implication that this may somehow be the child of the Doctor and Amy. Chatup lines like "Let's tangle our artron energy streams!" are why we fans can't get girlfriends...This would indeed be an awfully cringy turn of events.
• That said, I'm not going to totally rule it out as feasible, due to one most unusual Short Trip in Life Sciences. Don't laugh, but "The Reproductive Cycle" features the TARDIS and Kamelion having a child together, which is then raised by Six and Peri in a ghastly mockery of domesticity. It's also superlatively wonderful, I mean really just a slice of fried genius. And not what you'd expect from a story in which the central cast wind up married and the TARDIS get laid. So. Teaspoon and an open mind.
  

Notes that confused me but I may one day understand
Of course.
Click!
"But you're not really"
guns in TARDIS
Jump! cool.

The Impossible Astronaut

"Let's see who tries to kill us and work backwards..." Are you keeping up?

I'm back for another season's fun, and working twice as hard to fill the lamentable gap caused by Behind the Sofa's extermination.

If you're new to Malcassairo, three rules apply. NO SPOILERS FOR FUTURE EPISODES. I am not especially interested in serious speculation on future episodes either. There will be spoilers for episodes I am reviewing, though, so if you haven't seen this one you have been warned.

Team Traken - now boosted up to four members, wahey! - were joined by my male parental unit for a Who party; and I served drinks, growled at anyone who would dare make a squeak, and finally, established a River-free space. Team Traken are united in their dislike of the character, but sometime soon after realising she would be back I got bored of their whining. I griped about Series 5. A lot. My complaints were valid - I wasn't moaning for the sake of it - It's been a fun year. But I feel like I've exhausted all the entertainment to be had from it. I was bored - I'd rather ignore the flaws, and concentrate on the shiney as I seem so capable of doing for those other great classics of the series. Even though on rereads, my angry reviews are far better then those which are kind. We'd made all the arguments, and particularly those regarding the much reviled Ms Song, so I held the party on the grounds that no one was to complain about her.

Perhaps this created the requisite atmosphere of optimism. That or Impossible Astronaut was simply fantastic, and not just for the Adjective-Noun pair title that Who fans find so pleasing (and to think how popular The One With The Whale would have been if only they'd called it or The Star Whale or The Whale of Terror. Or The City of Death, considering it racks up so many more (i.e. more than two) deaths than that episode, if the entire Jagaroth species doesn't count. Call it Whale In Space and it might seem good by comparison)

The much hyped filming in Utah had seemed rather like that bus in Dubai which was the only information Gallifrey had to report on for the whole of 2009 - FILMING EXCLUSIVE! The bus has broken down! - plus a cynical attempt to cash in via BBC Worldwide. In fact, Utah is one of this episode's strengths, for The Impossible Alien is primarily about paranoia - that oft-praised preserve of the 1960s. It draws together a fantastic set of resonances: Utah, Roswell, the moon landings. The villains are a clever blend of iconic "grey" aliens and iconic Men In Black, who can make you forget. At the height of the cold war, starring Nixon, the president nobody could trust - who in turn, now, cannot trust his own FBI and needs an outsider to help. "I can't trust anyone," he moans to Colbert, before inexplicably encountering the ultimate outsiders and putting blank faith in them.

Yet I had already noted the paranoia, in the TARDIS. The Doctor's twitchy darkness - I liked it. River Song, whom he cannot trust. And like Nixon, he too finds himself having to trust in Amy. Optimism: what Doctor Who does best. One can imagine what a Blake's 7 episode based around the concept of trust would look like (and some of us poor sods don't have to).

This interlaced approach produced something far more nuanced than I had expected, that Russell T touch I had so missed. A twining of the monster-plot, with the emotional plot, and underlying theme into one beautiful holistic experience. The same cannot be said of Dubai - the dunes may have been deep, but not thematically so. It was just a landscape. This? Is a state of mind.

Perhaps this coherence tuned down the Moffiness to an acceptable level. My brain was busy shouting about how sick of amnesia, single-concept-monsters, creepy children, shambling faces in spacesuits, amnesia, token deaths and using the phrase "bumpy wumpy" does not distract us from the timey wimey. My brain is reminding me that this is the third amnesiac plotline; and the second monster you can't look at; and the second shambling space suit, and also the fifth time Matt Smith has died on screen. But it came together into a satisyfing whole, making it feel like the ultimate Moffathon instead of a greatest hits compilation - I would choose to criticise his earlier episodes in comparison to this. I'd still criticise it for being familiar, but as it remained unpredictable moment by moment I can forgive it for now.

Best of all, River Song was...OK. We all agreed she had improved, but perhaps they were lying to shut me up. I felt that she had mellowed as a character; or, perhaps, the acting has improved. However - by accident or design - this episode compensated for most of my dislike.

Starting with that whole "I know something you don't know" schtick. It's a great concept, but in practice always came across as smug. People who are smug about things they won't tell you are never pleasant. The Doctor's death paradoxically puts us on side with River. When she says "spoilers", we know what she can't say and why. We're in on the secret: our point of view has changed. For the first time, it feels like a game plan, an arc and I wonder if our initial dislike was part of this process.

And with the Doctor dead, River becomes a much needed liferaft. For a whole five minutes, she's not pissing you off by being more competant - she's the only competant one left. Usually, it is the Doctor who the audience look to solve their emotional needs - I want him to save the puppy! I want him to punish the wrongdoers! And when he does, we feel safe. For those five minutes, the Doctor is gone, and when he comes back we look to River, becase we want her to thump him in the face. I found the slap strangely disappointing in comparison! Those characteristics which, in the past, had seemed antagonistic, unecessary, and like poorly thought out feminism aided this transformation. We also, for the first time, get to see her forging relationships instead of "just accept that she and the Doctor have some relationship, OK?". The scenario makes River, Amy and Rory into conspirators - they have a connection, and we can see it, unlike merely being told to accept a connection which at some point may have happened outside of canon. The parallel made between Amy and River by Rory is particularly effective - we have seen how cruel Amy has been to Rory, forging an effective moment of empathy.

These points on competancy and perspective are underlined by a plot which requires the Doctor to take on a companion-like role. He is asking questions, others are withholding answers for their own agenda. He is following them, on trust. And he is not central (yet) to working out the main plot. Instead, he is this plots victim, it's object. For once, River isn't upstaging him by trying to do the same job with her similar skillset. Instead, they compliment one another - and I remember, as she tweaks the TARDIS, how fun competant companions such as Romana and Nyssa were. In this sense, she is the non-human-female-contemporary-Londoner assistant I had been hoping for.

For the first time, we see her fallible! This is important, given her innate Suishness, and especially given that scene in The Big Bang. Not even Chuck Norris can make a Dalek beg for mercy, Here, the gun runs out of bullets when she needs one more most. Serves her right for wasting one on the Stetson...this is acknowledged in the episode and a real step forward. Though not, of course, why she can safely ping the hat off a head, but not hit the far closer, far larger, lumbering astronaut, while runcibuling the water; or indeed why she felt her aim would be improved if she ran while doing it. But you can't have it all.

She lost even more Sue points for the attitude of fellow characters. It always bothered me that somehow, Moff had shoehorned his pet into a major plotline and the main cast loved her too.
Not today! The Doctor takes her to task for being a mystery, and clearly thinks she's awful. This attitude shift is more satisfying for me, for my point of view characters to be sharing my point of view again. There is a strong difference between a character who annoys, and a character who is meant to annoy. So, for once, the banter and teasing became two sided and had a proper frisson now.

I have surmised before that not knowing her history made her impossible to put in any sort of context. If she is Jenny, or the Rani, or Patience, or Romana, that gives her certain excuses for her perfection or preknowledge that "she's just some person" doesn't. But seeing her express what we always sort-of knew - that he goes backwards while she goes forwards, makes me think that ultimately - when I understand - her "final" episode will become a classic (sans that awful dream sequence, which is still misjudged). Now, for just one second, I felt a level of empathy for The Forest of the Dead which I have never before. Who knows? I might even be calling it an elegaic farewell to an iconic part of the mythology! Last night, extreme personal stress caused me to become a fully-subscribing fan of Martha Jones, so stranger things have happened.

It brings us back to point of view. When we first encountered River Song, our point of view was - as usual - that of the Doctor - "who on earth is this awful woman?". Every time Library is rewatched, with future episodes in mind, it takes is further from him and closer to her until ultimately, we will know her completely and be on her side and alienated from his. An episode which changes each time you see it, until you forget. How very Moff.



And lets talk about forgetting. As theoretically interesting as Amy's plotline was it, her habit of forgetting any major event killed any emotional development she might have had. Rendering last season rather cold and detached, for me at least. At least, now, that irritating trait is turned to good use. We still don't know about the crack; maybe the Threat is related to it?

The design is good - though Castellanne felt the mouths were too Dementor-like, with the unknown alien menace landing smack in the middle of uncanny valley (I know the press and the forums know and insist on using their names...you don't think that's a bit of a big spoiler?). These scenes were amazing - properly exciting, properly scary, and involving as we kept hoping that those companions would do what they were hired to, and scream. Much cushion-clutching going on in our household...

...and it wasn't until I was trying to sleep I put my finger on what was quite so threatening about them. Narratively, of course, it's great at raising tension ("There's two people having breakfast and there's a bomb under the table. If it explodes, that's a surprise. But if it doesn't..."). But the fact they could be in the room without you knowing makes them the ultimate Doctor Who villain. The most archetypal Who puts the monsters in the home - plastic dummies - and exploits fear of the known. There is no reason why there isn't one here now...


I felt, occasionally, there were too many companions, with some poorly directed scenes showing too much standing around. And I'm a fan of the "crowded TARDIS". But that was, perhaps, enthusiasm and now nostalgia. Not without cause did he utter "Brave heart, Canton!". In general, I thought the direction was good - together with the writing, either the budget has gone up or the defecit is more smartly covered. Despite the rather heavy concepts at work, it was well articulated and not overly confusing - I particularly liked Rory explaining to Amy what had just happened. Although dad did ask "is Rory still an Auton?", and we shushed him because the answer is "no", but we're still not sure why. The heroes investigating the Doctor's future murder is a cool concept, so again I can almost forgive them for killing him for the fifty-billionth time. I'll allow it this time, but don't do it again...

Onto the ongoing project of trying to work out who 11 is - and you'd think it would be easy for an episode which used the "Doctor who?" quip not once but twice.

Obviously, he does have an emergant 7 streak - but unlike 7, who seems to do it out of peverse enjoyment, it's more likely 11 just doesn't think of the effect it's going to cause. We have already observed he is one of the less-human-competant Doctors. Or rather, if he's not like 7 now...he will be in the future. Friend 2 noticed he spent a lot of this episode upside down - perhaps we can identify that as a trope? I'm just happy that hats are becoming a trope - Friend 4 wore a celebratory Stetson; I liked his space helmet. I also liked the older Doctor - as if Matt Smith's percieved old soul wasn't ancient enough already.

His death as it stands reminded me strongly of Logopolis. The astronaut has a similar, white-waxen look from a distance; the sound is cut out in both; the shot is very similar; while this maybe overstating it, one happens by a lake, the other on a bridge; and both accompany news of the Doctor's death. That mannerism of Matt Smith's seemed rather unmistakeable - the way Tom Baker seems to crumble on hearing it is one of the cruellest moments in the classic series.

First parters rely on their second to see if a coherent whole is being produced. It's likely some of this won't be tied up for weeks, but I have faith that part two will be quite the treat given Moff's avowed technique of making part 2 a second episode, not a continuation of the first. We all like Mark Shepperd and hope he gets something to do then. I guess so. We also thought from the trailer that the 9/10 TARDIS might be back, but the shots here reveal it was just close-ups on this TARDIS. Probably for the best - but we were right, there was another TARDIS in there; and Adrasta and I were right last year when we speculated that the Lodger TARDIS would be back. Admittedly our theory was still cooler, but I'm happy and excited. Or, as Castellane put it in the episode's only vocal interruption,

"GOODNESS!"



Other Points

• "And two of them fancied me" - hello, gay agenda! They've always pigeonholed RTD for this, but initially it was actually Moff who packed the most into his episodes. This is one of the cheeky (and I dare say, brave) uses I've seen - implying that two of America's founding fathers were queer? That's going to cause some red faces.
• Given all the thought I've done on gender recently, it stuck out when everyone assumed the child was male due to the "male name". I am interested by how they have since undermined it - the voice of a girl, the name of a boy, and seemingly the face of a boy too. So what's going on there...?
  
• DWM suggested Amy was a step backwards for her middle class stat. While I don't necessarily agree - while in the context of the entire show it's very familiar, it's actually an unusual choice in the context of the new - the shot of her and Rory hopping off the bus ('cus they could just afford to go to Utah, randomly) with backpacks amused me as very "gap yah".
• I am fairly sure Rory made credits for the Christmas special. Still made me happy to see it here again though!
• The idea that the Doctor in some way "created" and ruined River is interesting
• "President please help me" taps into a very cliche American sensibility. Still spooky though.
  
• Again, I am reminded of Lawrence Miles - the Doctor at his own funeral in Alien Bodies; the surprise death in Interference. I'm not sure this means anything, except that I admire his work and consider it canon.
  
• Caitlin Moran suggested a comparison to Alzheimers.
  
• I thought the on-screen, fullbodied explosion was a bit much, but no one else did so perhaps I'm sensitive.
• The Doctor describes Amy as "the legs", confirming everything I ever thought about that character's underdevelopment.
• When River wearily picks up the can and grimly intones "We do what we do best", my first reaction was "burn stuff?"

Lines I liked
"She's doing it again. Doctor Song sir, She's packing"

"Clayton Delware III How many can there be? Well....3 actually...."

"That's OK, you were my second choice for President."

"He can't alter his own past - it would rip a hole in the universe and destroy everything."
"He's done it before!"
"And, to be fair, the universe DID explode..."

Doctor: Vietnam, Watergate.
River: Also some good stuff.
Doctor: Not nearly enough.
River: Hippie!
Doctor: Archaeologist!

"I'm being extremely clever up here and there's no-one to stand around looking impressed. What's the point in having you all?"

River: This is cold. Even for you, this is cold!
"Or, hello?"

Rory (when the Doctor asks him if everyone is angry with him): "I'll find out."

"Do not compliment the intruder!"

"One of them is worth listening to!

"Florida, where the spacemen live"

"No life signs - the worst kind" reminded me of Earthshock

"Bless!"

Speculation

I am not interested in discussing this in any detail, because I'm just tossing around ideas. The moment theories get indepth, you're storywriting and setting yourself up for a fall when yours is better. Like my extreme disappointment when last year's megatheory went to pot. However:

• is that other TARDIS the Doctor's? It still could be, even if it does look a bit eeevil. I'm going to keep coughing "Valeyard" in this corner, although if it is a Time-villain someone like the Monk or Toymaker seems more likely. Will this be the exciting voice from the trailer?
• I think Amy is pregnant; but I think her choice to tell him there was her forgetting. I noted both she and River experiencing a sickness - so maybe Amy rationalised it as that other thing she had to tell him.
• Was that the silence as he talked to the astronaut?
• Given the Logopolis parallels, and that Friend 2 noticed they were the same height, is the astronaut a third Doctor?
• Given the fact characters wouldn't be able to remember occasions they have seen the Threat, and Moff's past behavior, I have a theory that we will see an episode at least revisited with the Threat revealed to be there all along. Yes. Just like with the non-chronological Doctor appearance last time. Possibly in the previous season.
• It's still possible that the Doctor already knows about the future death, although not sure for what dramatic purpose.
• It'll be unpleasant if Amy's shot at the astronaut is going to cause the Doctor's future death in some sort of closed loop.

Notes that I don't understand now but may in the future

• "Yeah, just a bit"
• Mrs Rob
• no interfere
• bad move
• music
• "Whole earth"
• Well, 3